Rental Dementia

Told you so... and don't mind saying so...

2011-04-08T11:53:00.001-04:00

Rental Market has been TOUGH lately, very little ad response, phone is quiet, and no one is moving unless they have to. Vacancy rate isn't budging, and will go lower come later Spring. Yet a doorman building on Union Square, where high floor studios for $3600 a month, can't move them. What to do, what to do

Village Rental Market Heats Up

2011-04-07T16:44:00.001-04:00

Elk Investors, not known for managing premium buildings (in fact the buildings they represent, like 35 Grove, 30 Christopher, 123 Bank are all pretty sub standard but at least reasonably priced) has three applications on three units that just hit the market this week. All of them in the Village. Two mentioned above. So 3 and a half days, priced correctly sub standard units are by all account gone baby gone. Inventory must be pretty low, or prices must be too high.

Shady Renter Rats Out Real Estate Agent

2011-03-28T17:50:00.007-04:00

YELP has some really funny reviews of real estate agents. Best is the renter who gets caught going behind his agent's back only to get caught. He's irate and it's the sneaky biz practices which are ultimately to blame.

Broker Cons and Healthy Skepticism

2011-03-28T04:03:00.001-04:00

A very insightful video on how to see through Broker Tricks. Because we all know Brokers bribe inspectors and one other outstanding piece of advice: Never Ever have an open house. Plus a Terrific soundtrack and some awesome acting.

Days Off

2011-03-27T11:55:00.002-04:00

Looks Like 92 Street, but I could be wrong.

Welcome Back

2011-03-10T12:42:00.004-05:00

Well now that the real estate market appears to have at least stabilized, and I along with it, though in my case a full recovery is still a long way off, I've decided to do a little writing again. So I leave the question open: Is the NYC real estate market back? Or are we in for more of the same?

White Collar Lay Offs

2008-12-12T12:02:00.014-05:00

No need for analysis. Ny Times

Nader Claims God not RE Agent

2008-12-11T18:18:00.006-05:00

.... though I'd add probably not a politician either, but more like a mortgage broker.

Vacancy Rate Jump

2008-12-05T15:46:00.006-05:00

This can't be good for the rental market, or the agents who inhabit it.

Dead Last

2006-11-28T15:47:00.000-05:00

This would seem to confirm my unfortunate and long held assumptions. In a poll measuring the most prestigious careers, Real Estate Agents came in dead last. Bottom of the barrel as usual... at least in public perception. Thankfully we are in good company along side Business Execs, stock brokers, journalists, and black market baby smugglers. Firefighters top the list, which seems a little ironic to me. The person who found you your house is a dim wit, but the guy who stops it from burning down is a hero.

Crazy Brokers

2006-11-18T14:03:00.000-05:00

If you've got a crazy broker story or you are a crazy broker, drop me a line at Brian.Carterny [@} gmail.com I'd love to hear some war stories or which shady angle your agent tried pitching you. It's a desperate business with a ton of sneaky characters, so let me know if you've run into any.

Bob Updated

2006-10-06T11:36:00.000-04:00

If you've read the column on "Bob" you know what a difficult individual he can be. You also may have a better understanding of why agents are often....let's just say...a little less than forthright. The saga with Bob actually continued after publication. Bob did finally fill out an entire application on his first choice, and he did finally go back and see his second choice one last time. Again he was initially distraught over not being able to rent this second one. The second one rented again, before Bob could make a decision, and as we waited almost a week to pull the trigger on the first, Bob lost that one as well. So, less than a week before he was hoping to move he had yet to secure an apartment and had lost two good ones. For my part I wasted two weeks working with a complete zero. Two weeks work in this business often results in exactly that...nothing...no paycheck...no compensation for hours of work. Hate your job? I understand...but you probably get a paycheck at the end of the week. A difficult job that doesn't pay though...well...is there a name for that? Bob disappeared after that. A glutton for punishment, or trying to salvage some money for my part, I called him with the bad news about his first choice and mentioned another apartment that had just come on the market. He never called back.

Told You So

2006-10-03T17:09:00.001-04:00

Proving my point , that for every dishonest, pushy broker... there is an idiotic, unrealistic client. It's all cause and effect. No one comes into the business hoping to screw people over, but after getting beat with the short end of the stick a thousand times, you spend less time worrying about the renters and more time watching out for your own end. Makes perfect sense when guys like this are out there.

Mentor Me Babs

2006-09-28T14:34:00.000-04:00

Babs Corcoran gives me some...well a lot of advice on Curbed thread this morning. She in leather...me a naughty little agent, almost too good to imagine.

The Gruntster

2006-09-21T23:12:00.000-04:00

Tourists in Chinatown???

This guy guy cracks me up.

An interesting take on the Chinese surviving the invasion of condos into their neighborhood. Pretty hilarious if read in the right light. This is serious real estate reporting.

Endless Inbox

2006-09-18T11:36:00.000-04:00

Every day an endless array of new e-mails containing the latest listings, trumpeting the newest, greatest, bestest, never before seen, one of a kind, must see, and must have new square little white boxes. After awhile they all start to look the same to me.

Unlikely

2006-09-15T11:31:00.000-04:00

Here out of habit. Working with a few clients, and just to give you a sense of how slow it really is (at least in this shabby little office), I'm serioulsy looking for a two bedroom for $2600 with a real living room. When asked what neighborhood I was supposed to find this impossible space in, they replied "West Village, Tribeca, Soho,... maybe the East Village, but that's sort of a long commute." In other words, they would settle for any number of Manhattan's premier and most expensive neighborhoods. But they are, "Like, so over Hoboken." So here I am, but not sure why.

Shakedown Street

2006-09-12T13:59:00.000-04:00

Here's a preview of this weeks column, from NYPRESS.

We had a long-standing and dubious arrangement, a deal with the devil, but in this case, the devil is an incompetent half-wit, and I’m getting very little for my unblemished soul. For every deal we do, my company kicks back half of the fee to the building managers. They in turn provide us “exclusive access.” The big problem is the access is no longer exclusive. A few other shops get the same arrangement. So for an average deal we’re kicking-back a couple thousand dollars, but the wheels aren’t getting greased, and we aren’t getting any real preference. It feels more like a shakedown than a smart business move. They get paid on every deal, regardless of who brings it.

Back To Business

2006-09-12T13:20:00.000-04:00

Crazy isn't it? Five years later and it still haunts us. But we're all moving forward as best we can. Richard Serra on Charlie Rose last night was very powerful, and asked some pretty scary questions. But Real Estate Right? That's the agenda and that's the important thing to focus on... right? Hmmm, must have at least one thing to say about it...I'm an agent...I'm at work....it'll come....ah???

Agents Steal Actors Thunder

2006-09-08T10:29:00.000-04:00

Can't get away from Real Estate. Waiting for DeathVariations, an uplifting little play about suicide, to begin last night at 59 E. 59th Street, and of all things to talk about in NYC before a play starts, the two girls behind me are gabbing about what they referred to as their "favorite real estate agent." He apparently works for Citi-habitats and has just e-mailed his monthly newsletter, complete with picture (which they didn't seem to like very much), that covers all of his real estate doings, including his listings, and what he has just rented. Really sad, and almost as tragic as the play itself.

Lazy Boy

2006-09-06T17:44:00.000-04:00

With not a single current listing posted in about month, there's little reason to pick up the phone. Writing has taken over, and I still really haven't gotten the hang of this whole blog thing. I need a coffee... and then a walk... maybe a couple more days off...then I'll get back to work.

Have You Seen Summer?

2006-08-31T12:26:00.000-04:00

Yeah a bit grey, and very slow. I'm back almost a week from another minor get away, and I'm already nervous about making ends meet in the months to come. But it's been a relatively productive week, with one mini deal in the works on a co-broke studio, a new sales client, and another couple looking to rent. The studio deal is a co-op and my client is great. It took almost two days to complete the application process and we still have to get it over to the managing agent. The package is just about identical to the one you fill out when buying, and another example of how absurd this business can get. I haven't advertised a single apartment in three weeks, and keep telling myself that come September, I'll gear up again.

Crazy and True

2006-08-29T14:43:00.000-04:00

Talk this morning here at the chop shop (rental office) that the slow sales market will push rentals back into the light and benefit the rental agents. Articles all over this weekend in Barron's, The Wall Street Journal, The NY Times, and even Brownstoner, about that persistent bubble thing. It was less than a year ago that major rental buildings went condo...so what are the chances of them going back to rental?

Little Devils

2006-08-27T09:48:00.000-04:00

Popular opinion holds that it's the agents you have to watch out for. It couldn't be the honest hard working folks looking to rent or buy, and it's certainly not the Landlords, although even the name itself conjures medieval lords thrashing unruly subjects or in our case late rent payers. NO it's the evil agents starting all the trouble. Bullshit.
I can't apologize for making a living, not in this city. True their are a fair number of hustlers out there, but they can't shoulder all of the blame either. Why is it, no one complains as much about landlords -- who set prices, or am I just missing it?

Vacation of Sorts

2006-08-24T18:45:00.000-04:00

It may just be impossible for a New Yorker with a laptop to take a real vacation...to go anywhere in the world and forget for a few moments what inevitably awaits our return. It's especially hard when anywhere in the world happens to be Ocean City Maryland. That's right, I admit it...I'm vacationing in Maryland. (Don't ask, and accept my admission as proof enough.) But that's the lack of posts, and vacation is a relative term when you work in real estate. It's impossible for instance to pass a huge for-sale sign prominently displayed on a front yard, featuring a big cheesy picture of the listing agent, and not think for a second...holy shit, Is that what I do for a living? Am I that guy? Do I in any way resemble this jerk wad? It's enough to ruin yet another semi-vacation. Well that and the incessant news about real estate bubbles down here and how creative it's become to offer a TV with the new house. I'll be back in NYC soon enough.

Throwing Stones

2006-08-21T11:05:00.000-04:00

Famine, unjustified wars, genocide, and real estate agents? Curbed.com picks up the column and riot erupts.
While another blog projects a cleaner image.

Even Experts Don't Get It

2006-08-17T22:56:00.000-04:00

While the experts marvel over $3000 one bedrooms in this steamy apple, I was showing two in the village... but at $3200 an $3500. Neither had a doorman. And it's not just the village. A few brokers from my company and I, just finsished pricing a building on E. 63rd, with the same results. The building managers asked us to go in and take a look, and recommend prices. We do. We argue. We decide to go a little low to make it easy on ourselves. Managment talks to Landlord who goes $200 over every price we suggested. $3000 a one bedroom my ass. Try $3300

BROOKLYN NIGHT

2006-08-17T19:53:00.000-04:00

What the hell was I doing standing in the freezing cold in Brooklyn?
The guy had me waiting on the corner for forty-five minutes before he finally showed, pushing some story about traffic and leaving the office late. He was never going to rent the place anyway, making the entire evening a total waste. There was no point telling him what I really thought. Besides I liked it, waiting around and hoping this might turn into some money. I really had no place to be. I was right, he didn't take the apartment. Apologized for wasting my time. I wasn't complaining there was a lot to learn.

Soho Morning

2006-08-17T11:57:00.000-04:00

This shabby real estate routine is finally beginning to suit me. I've got three years invested into what began as a whim and a small step out from behind bars. My criminal record aside, I couldn't serve another drink. Who knew then The New York Times would run a story two years later announcing the slew of new characters joining the agent game. The story picked up a bit of momentum, and as brown is the new black, huffing rentals is the new bartending. Instead of serving Bloody Mary's at brunch, they're spending Sunday's running clients all over the city from one open house to another. But fear not, it's nothing a tight market can't rectify. A few lean months and most of these speculaters will be back behind bars making small talk and working once again on that screenplay about the bartender trying to bust out. Good luck chumps, I'm in it for the long haul, tight market or easy money, I like this routine, and I love Soho in the morning.